Christmas comes but once a year – How to resolve a child contact dispute over the festive period

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Wendy Wharton, Head of Family at Thomson Hayton Winkley from writes:

We may only be in early November, but it is never too early to plan child arrangements for the festive period. With the arrival of cold dark nights, it is becoming more apparent that Christmas is fast approaching.

Its completely natural for parents to want the experience of their child waking up with them in their home on Christmas morning.  Separated parents find it challenging at the best of times to agree how to manage this after separation.

Many separated parents cannot reach an amicable agreement regarding contact, when they should be doing all that they can to give their children a wonderful experience, no matter who they are with.

Celebrating these special occasions are one of the highlights of being a parent and just because mum and dad are no longer together, does not mean that one is better than the other and that such special occasions should not be shared.

Not having an amicable arrangement, can cause distress for your children who, yes, will be at the centre of your row.  In our experience such disagreements carry on way past the festive period and continue when arranging ongoing contact.

People do plan ahead and we find that this is probably the main cause of rows about arrangements.  It is therefore your responsibility as parents to discuss your plans in advance  to try and avoid such situations.

Who is entitled to have the children on Christmas Day?

There is currently no provision in law for Christmas arrangements. The view of the Court seems to be that children should spend quality time with both parents over Christmas and it is a child’s right to continue to have a personal relationship with their parents after separation –  unless there is good reason not to. So again the advice is that parents try and reach agreement themselves.

Do bear in mind that if your child is old enough, it is very important to include their opinions in the decision-making process, so that you have their best interests at the centre of all discussions. Courts are only willing to intervene in the very last instance where all other options have been explored and still no agreement has been reached.

We advise parents to consider possible solutions such as  their child spending Christmas Day with one parent and then Boxing Day with the other. This way it is almost as though the child is having two Christmas Days.  A further option is to split Christmas Day up, Christmas Eve and Christmas morning will be spent with one parent and then Christmas afternoon and Boxing Day will be spent with the other parent. This could even be alternated each year. Some separated parents may have the child every year and invite the other parent to join them.  We know this is not always possible however or practical.

Recording the agreement

Once you have a plan in place, the best thing to do is to put it in writing and send it to the other parent. Then if there are any subsequent issues, these can be resolved in good time before Christmas, and it should help to avoid any misunderstandings during the festive season.

In summary

Disagreements over child contact arrangements at Christmas are often emotionally charged and continue to be difficult to resolve, with the rows continuing even after the festive period has ended.

That said as long as you, as parents, are prepared to be reasonable and fair with each other and share such times, even the most heated disagreement can be resolved.

While the courts may make a decision on such matters, this is not a quick process and the decision they make may not be as you would wish.

How we can help

If the parties cannot agree, this is where we can help you work through the dispute and try to reach an amicable agreement. https://www.thwlegal.co.uk/contact-us/

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25% Discount Offer with Leader Connect

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By Mary Ballard, Founder and Editor of Showcase Cumbria


Dear Readers,

I am thrilled to share an exciting opportunity with you! As many of you know, I have recently embarked on a journey with Leader Connect (a Cumbrian-based company), and I am eager to tell you about the incredible courses they offer. Currently, there is a fantastic 25% discount that you simply cannot miss!

What has truly impressed me about Leader Connect is the quality of their courses. They are designed to be easily integrated into your busy schedule, making it possible to learn between work/running your business and meetings. I have already gained so much knowledge from these courses, and I am confident you will too.

Affordable and High-Quality Learning

Leader Connect offers courses at an affordable price point, which is a refreshing change from what is typically available. Most courses are priced at just £11.99 each and include a recap and certification upon completion. There are also courses available for as little as £3.79, and this is before applying the 25% discount!

Expert-Led Courses

These courses are created by recognised and experienced experts in their fields, including Leader Connect’s founder, Course Director, and Coach, Neil Jurd OBE, who is also the author of “The Leadership Book.”

Neil Jurd OBE, Leader Connect’s founder, Course Director, and Coach

If you haven’t had the chance to explore Leader Connect yet, I highly recommend visiting their website here

They offer a wide range of courses with more on the way! https://leader-connect.co.uk/courses/?utm_source=Showcase+Cumbria&utm_medium=Email&utm_campaign=Leader+Connect+Launch&utm_id=02

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Use the code INTRO25 to get 25% off any course or the annual subscription for the first year. Don’t miss out on this opportunity to enhance your skills or those of your employees with top-notch content. It’s perfect for your Continuing Professional Development (CPD).

If you are interested in being a part of Leader Connect and have a course to offer, I would be happy to introduce you to Neil Jurd OBE. Just let me know! Email me on info@showcasecumbria.co.uk

Happy Learning!

Warm regards,

Mary Ballard
Founder and Editor, Showcase Cumbria

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Leaders as Culture Architects: Crafting a Thriving Workplace Environment

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By Richard Thompson, Co-Founder & Director of Odyssey Consulting Ltd

If you were building a house, you’d probably start by engaging an architect. Ideally a good one. That way, you can ensure the end product is well-built, on solid foundations fit for purpose and will last for years to come.

Workplace culture should be no different. Workplaces also need architects to craft healthy cultures that are well-built, on solid foundations, fit for purpose and will last for years to come. That’s how organisations will get the highest performance, the best retention rates and the least amount of risk.

Architects (of the building variety!) have years of training before they are let lose on the job. Leaders rarely have that luxury and are often thrown into leadership roles without the requisite learning and development to upskill them as culture architects. And that’s a mistake – organisations should be taking leadership development very seriously, investing in bespoke leadership development programmes that are tailored to their specific needs.

By its very nature, workplace culture is complex, nuanced and can be difficult to navigate. Leaders need to have the skills, knowledge and experience to handle tricky issues in order to set the tone and continually drive workplace culture forward. It’s also a never-ending job – culture shifts and changes like sand and leaders need to evolve and move with the times.

Off-the-shelf or one-off training interventions can be helpful but tend to be more educational in nature. To truly develop leaders into culture architects requires a more transformational approach that is delivered consistently over a period of time. Here’s how you can achieve that:

· Be intentional about creating a strategic goal for your leadership development programme – what are you hoping to achieve?;

· Create multiple touchpoints – workshops, 1:1 coaching, group coaching and self led-learning;

· Design content off the back of research – use your employee voice to understand where the skills and behavioural gaps are;

· Allow time for the learning to bed-in – learning touchpoints should be interspersed to allow time for reflection and practice;

· Create community learning spaces – cohorts should be encouraged to continue the conversation;

· Have an eye on return on investment – how will impact be measured to understand what comes next.

As we move towards 2025, it is a good time for employers to reflect on the culture they currently have, the culture they aspire to create and to think about how they can nurture and develop their leaders to become true culture architects.

If you would like to discuss how Odyssey Consulting Ltd can help your leaders to become culture architects, please contact Richard Thompson via email richard@odyssey-consulting.co.uk or head to odyssey-consulting.co.uk to find out more.

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The Wonder of Walking

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by Lee Irving, Holistic Lifestyle Coach and director at Wellbeing by See Events

When did you last take a walk for no other reason than for the good of your wellbeing?

What I mean is not just a task orientated walk to get something done, like walking the dog or because you didn’t have the car, or you needed to get the numbers up on your pedometer, but just because you enjoy it and it makes you feel good. Hopefully this article will help you appreciate the latter as opposed to the former. You see, as human beings we are designed to walk, and walking has many health benefits, many more than simply exercise.

Let’s look at walking compared to running as an example. You might think ‘running is going to get you to where you want to be faster’, or ‘running is better for you’. The first may be true and the second might be in some cases, but not always.

Let’s consider it from the point of view of stress. Stress effects an awful lot of people these days and I am always looking at ways that I can help people reduce stress in their lives. I know that whenever I run, especially if I sprint, I am activating the sympathetic arm of my autonomic nervous system; often referred to as the ‘fight or flight response’. This is because the primitive part of my brain that is responsible for turning on a stress response like this is connected to my body and reacts to any sudden exertion as a physical response to a threat and sets off the danger alarm. It sounds very much like an overreaction and in most cases it is, but, as I said, this is a very primitive system designed to keep us alive hundreds of thousands of years ago when there really were frequent life or death situations and it is still very much in charge today.

When I walk that part of my brain is getting the message that all is well, there are no imminent threats and life is good. When this happens my autonomic nervous system is in the parasympathetic branch or ‘rest and digest’, instead of tension I feel calm, I am more able to think clearly, my heartrate and blood pressure drop, I am more able to think creatively and be more nurturing towards myself and others, my awareness is opened up to notice and take in more information, I am responsive rather than reactive. Needless to say, when stressed I can expect the opposite of these positive states of being.

Many things in modern life can throw us into a stress state; work load, poor relationships, meetings, presentations, being late, the list goes on. So, whatever the cause of your stress, a walk in nature is a remarkable cure not just because of the slow pace but also because the sounds in nature resonate with our own energy signature at a cellular level. Trees and shrubs release airborne chemicals called phytoncides as a way of communicating to each other which are also proven to reduce stress levels in humans and increase white blood cell counts. Noticing the sights, sounds, smells and textures of nature brings our attention into the present moment which reduces mental stress like anxiety because when we are in the moment we cannot think about our problems, this is mindfulness. So why not get yourself into nature for a quick walk the next time you are feeling a little stressed.

Some tips for a nature walk –

· Go slowly – The mind and body are connected so when the mind starts racing the body will too. Check on your pace and slow it down if necessary.

· Use your senses to promote mindfulness – What can you see, hear, smell, feel or even taste.

· Hug a tree (or at least place the palms of your hands on one) – The tree will ground you. A bit like an electrical appliance needs earthing so do we as we are electrochemical machines.

· Talk to passers-by – We are social beings and working from home can have a negative effect on our social skills and needs.

· Make a quick nature walk a reward for completing tasks – Breaking up daily tasks can make them seem less overwhelming as they appear as a whole.

Find out more on Wellbeing by See Event, head to https://www.see-events.co.uk/

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The Comprehensive Guide to Electric Vehicles: Benefits, Charging, and Considerations

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By Armstrong Vehicle Centre https://www.armstrongvehiclecentre.co.uk/

(Credit: Armstrong Vehicle Centre, Kingstown, Carlisle. 31st July 2024 Photograph by Jonathan Becker)

As the global push towards sustainability accelerates, electric vehicles (EVs) are increasingly becoming the transportation of choice. With significant advancements in technology, infrastructure, and governmental support, the transition from internal combustion engine (ICE) vehicles to electric ones is not just a trend but a necessary evolution. This article explores the numerous advantages of EVs, the factors affecting their range, charging options, and important considerations for prospective buyers.

Advantages of Electric Vehicles

Electric vehicles offer a host of benefits that make them an attractive alternative to traditional petrol and diesel vehicles. These advantages span environmental, economic, and practical considerations:

1. Zero Emissions: Unlike their ICE counterparts, EVs produce no carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions, contributing significantly to reducing air pollution and mitigating climate change.

2. No Fumes: EVs eliminate harmful exhaust fumes, leading to cleaner air and a healthier environment.

3. Quiet Operation: The absence of noisy engines makes EVs incredibly quiet, reducing noise pollution in urban areas.

4. Smooth Driving Experience: EVs provide a smooth and vibration-free ride due to their electric motors, which offer instant torque without the need for gear changes.

5. No Gear Changes: The automatic transmission in EVs simplifies driving, making them more accessible to a broader range of drivers.

6. Cost Savings: EVs offer several cost advantages, including free parking in many areas and exemption from congestion charges in Low Emission Zones (LEZ), Ultra-Low Emission Zones (ULEZ), and Clean Air Zones (CAZ).

7. Tax Incentives: Governments around the world provide numerous incentives for EV buyers. In the UK, these include zero Vehicle Excise Duty (VED), the ability to write down 100% of the vehicle cost against profit in the first year, and a 130% super deduction for charging infrastructure. Additionally, there are government grants available (OZEV), 0% company car tax on electric commercial vehicles, and a 2% Benefit-in-Kind (BIK) tax rate on electric company cars until 2025.

8. Low Running Costs: EVs generally have lower running costs compared to ICE vehicles. They require less maintenance, and electricity is cheaper than petrol or diesel.

Factors Affecting Electric Vehicle Range

While EVs offer numerous benefits, their range—the distance they can travel on a single charge—can vary significantly based on several factors:

1. Payload: The weight of the cargo and passengers affects the vehicle’s energy consumption and, therefore, its range.

2. Weather Conditions: Cold or extremely hot weather can reduce battery efficiency, impacting range.

3. Temperature: Batteries perform optimally within a certain temperature range. Extreme temperatures can degrade performance.

4. Driving Style: Aggressive driving with rapid acceleration and high speeds can drain the battery faster than a more conservative driving style.

5. Driving Speed: Higher speeds increase energy consumption, reducing the overall range.

6. Heating and Air Conditioning: Using the vehicle’s heating or air conditioning systems draws energy from the battery, decreasing range. However, most other functions, like lights and wipers, operate on a 12V battery, having minimal impact on range.

7. Regenerative Braking: EVs use regenerative braking to recover energy during deceleration, which helps to extend the vehicle’s range. By converting kinetic energy back into electrical energy, regenerative braking reduces the overall energy consumption, particularly in stop and go traffic.

Drivers transitioning to EVs may initially experience range anxiety—a fear of running out of charge before reaching a destination. However, as they become more familiar with their vehicle’s capabilities and charging infrastructure, this concern typically diminishes.

Charging Electric Vehicles

EVs can be charged using either Alternating Current (AC) or Direct Current (DC), each offering different speeds and convenience levels.

1. AC Charging:

– Slow Charging: This is typically done through a standard 3-pin domestic socket, delivering a maximum of 3.6 kWh. This method is convenient but slow.

– Fast Charging: A wall box can provide faster charging, with home units offering up to 7.4 kWh and work/public stations delivering up to 22 kWh. However, the speed is limited by the vehicle’s onboard charger, typically 7.4 kWh or 11 kWh. Even if a 22 kWh wall charger is used, the vehicle will only charge at the maximum rate supported by its onboard charger.

2. DC Charging:

– Rapid Charging: This method bypasses the onboard charger, feeding power directly to the battery, allowing for much faster charging times. Rapid chargers, often found at service stations, can charge a vehicle’s battery to 80% in about 30 minutes, depending on the charger’s rate.

– Ultra-Rapid Charging: These chargers, now appearing across the UK, offer rates between 100 kW and 350 kW, significantly reducing charging times.

Most EVs are equipped with a Type 2 plug and may also support the Combined Charging System (CCS) for rapid charging. It’s important to note that charging cables lock in place during charging for safety and should not be forcibly removed. The ZapMap app is a valuable tool for locating and navigating to compatible charging stations, offering a user-friendly interface to filter and find the right charging options.

Charging Time and Speed

Charging times vary depending on the battery capacity and the charging rate. For example, a vehicle with a 50 kWh battery charged with a 3.6 kWh domestic charger will take approximately 14 hours to fully charge. The same vehicle would take about 7 hours with a 7.4 kWh wall charger, assuming it has a 7.4 kWh onboard charger. Rapid charging, on the other hand, can bring the battery up to 80% in just 40 minutes, making it a practical option for long journeys.

Future Considerations and Misconceptions

The UK government’s ban on the sale of new petrol and diesel vehicles by 2035 is fast approaching, making the adoption of EVs inevitable. Despite some misconceptions circulating online about EVs, particularly regarding range and charging infrastructure, the reality is far more encouraging. With over 66,000 charging points across 34,570 locations in the UK as of July 2024—a 46% increase from the previous year—the infrastructure is rapidly expanding to meet demand.

When considering the purchase of an EV, it’s essential to calculate the total cost of ownership, which often reveals that EVs are more cost-effective than ICE vehicles. This calculation should include monthly payments, servicing costs, road tax, ULEZ, LEZ, and CAZ fees, as well as fuel or electricity costs.

Conclusion

Electric vehicles represent the future of transportation, offering substantial environmental, economic, and practical benefits. While there are considerations regarding range and charging, the infrastructure is improving rapidly, and the total cost of ownership often favors EVs over traditional vehicles. As the 2035 deadline approaches, the shift to electric mobility will not only be a personal choice but a societal imperative for a sustainable future.

Find out more on their website www.armstrongvehiclecentre.co.uk

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What is Menopause?

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Expert article by Tish Fisher, founder of Menopause Body & Mind

So……“What is menopause?” I hear you ask ………. A very good question. Some
would say an hormonal deficiency, others would say end of monthly
menstruation whilst those going through it may describe it as a nightmare!
The more broadly used word “menopause” however is an umbrella term for the
transformational journey that individuals undertake during their life cycle. That
transformational journey is made up of 3 stages: perimenopause, menopause
and post-menopause. Each stage is different and can bring both challenges and
rewards.
“What does the word ‘menopause’ conjure up for you?”
When I ask this question during my sessions, the reply is usually hot, angry,
tired, old. I have only ever had one lady shout out “fabulous”! I was obviously
intrigued – why? She explained that she really wanted to continue working so
whilst she struggled with her symptoms, she worked hard at a change of
mindset. I would love to think in a perfect world that we could all work on
mindset and everything would be OK and our symptoms and challenges would
diminish. Alas, in the real world, individuals can suffer many complications
during menopause which cannot be helped by mindset alone.
Whilst organisations are engaging with menopause a little more now,
unfortunately it continues to conjure up negative connotations; from the pictures
we see, to the articles we read and even to some individuals still rolling their
eyes at the mere mention of it in the workplace! But I see this as a positive
journey and my message to everyone is:

Menopause is nothing to be ashamed of. It DOES NOT symbolise
old age or the end, just the beginning of a new chapter.
And guess what – YOU get to write that chapter

  • so make it an exciting one!
    I’ll be honest, I’m very young at heart and thought I was way too young to go
    through the menopause. As a result, when it came along, it hit me like a tonne of
    bricks! My journey started with the emotional side. I found myself crying on the
    way to work every day for no apparent reason. It was only a couple of months
    down the line when the hot flushes started, that I joined the dots. If nothing else,
    it made me realise that I knew very little about it other than my mum and her
    hot flushes and night sweats. I certainly hadn’t appreciated how many symptoms
    there were to navigate or that there was even an emotional side!
    My saving grace was that I went through it with my bestie – we laughed, we cried,
    we shared but, more importantly, we supported each other. Everyone needs that
    peer support whether it is at home, through friendships or in the workplace. It
    can be the difference between a good menopause and a bad one!
    For any organisation/individual – EDUCATION IS KEY.
    Organisations need to understand the 4 key areas as to why being ‘menopause
    friendly’ is important, how it can save their organisations money and future
    proof their business.
    Individuals need to understand what’s happening in menopause so that they
    can:
  • make informed choices and help themselves
  • support their work colleagues
  • support their family members/friends
    For those with any doubts as to the importance of education, I would like to
    share this story:
    A lady visiting her 92 year old mother, had an unexpected conversation with her
    Mum’s 94 year old partner, Ron. Ron is a man of few words who has lived and
    worked on a farm all his life. You could say he holds traditional, conservative
    attitudes typical of a man of his age and background. He asked the lady where
    she was off to work next. Tasmania she said. Ron: Is that for the menopause
    thing you do? Lady: Yes
    Ron continues to ask questions in black: the lady answers in red
  • Is that to talk to the bosses who are blokes, so they can understand it better?
    (Goal in one!) Yes and to the women too because we don’t know enough either.
  • How long does menopause take? Could be 2 years, could be 10. Ron looks
    taken aback. Its kind of like adolescence in reverse, it can take a while.
  • What about in other cultures? Is it the same for them? All females go through
    menopause, but there can be some differences in symptoms between cultures
    and races.
  • I wonder why women go through menopause? So we can stop breeding and
    start leading!
  • Do they have anything for the ones who have really bad symptoms? Yes HRT
    can be effective but many doctors aren’t educated about the latest, safer types,
    so can be reluctant to prescribe it.
  • Is it very expensive? It can be if you choose to go private – @ £200! Ron
    grimaces – oogh, that is expensive. However, there are more affordable routes
    via the NHS.
  • So do they have some kind of leave, like they have maternity leave? (A
    controversial idea to us, but the idea arose naturally for Ron). Generally not,
    but watch this space.
  • Leave would help though surely? Yes, leave could be very helpful for the small
    % that have severe symptoms to help them keep their jobs.
  • Yes, especially cos as you get older they might want to get rid of you! (Bingo!).
  • Well we didn’t talk about this 50 years ago. We weren’t talking about it 5 years
    ago!
    In 10 minutes Ron covered nearly all the key issues being raised with regards to
    menopause: workplace awareness, retaining older females, the silence, leave,
    cultural differences, the cost and availability of HRT etc. No briefing papers
    needed there! Just the clear seeing of fresh eyes, an uncomplicated mind and a
    lifetime of caring for animals through various stages of the lifecycle. Ron knows
    the female body is different and has different needs at different stages of life. IT
    REALLY IS AS SIMPLE AS THAT!
    Guys – if Ron (born 1930) can talk about it, so can you!
    Everyone – Don’t assume men won’t be interested
    I delivered a session recently to @ 45 construction workers. Of course there was
    the odd smutty comment or what we would have referred to in our youth as
    ‘banter’, I wouldn’t have expected anything less. However, the majority embraced
    the information given, thanked me for highlighting the problems that can be
    faced and said they would be more understanding, supportive and kinder in
    future.
    For all those organisations out there still considering whether to prioritise
    menopause, it doesn’t have to be complicated. Here are 4 things to think about:
  • Name it – acknowledge menopause exists and normalise conversations.
  • Reframe it – see it as a positive. Its a powerful process in a women’s life that, if
    supported, will benefit everyone.
  • Equip your people – give them good quality information as to how they can
    help themselves.
  • Equip your managers with the skills to have health related, sensitive
    conversations with those women who do want to talk about menopause.
  • Adjust some of the work factors that can impact on an individuals ability to
    take care of themselves and their work as they work their way through
    menopause. These can be simple, inexpensive and often temporary
    adjustments.
    For all those individuals out there likely to go through it, I leave you with this:
    Remember – be bold and be brill. You really can achieve
    anything you want to at any age. Ray Kroc was 52 before he
    opened the first McDonalds franchise restaurant!

To find out more and how Tish Fisher, founder of Menopause Body & Mind can help, head to her website https://www.menopausebodyandmind.com/

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The Meeting Money Pit.

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By Eve Halliday, Founder and Growth Partner at Copper Tree Growth Partners

One of the most common challenges businesses face is the constant push to save money. While there’s no universal formula there is one area, I always focus on with every company I work with is the “meeting money pit.”

Let’s be honest—we’re all guilty of it. Scheduling a quick half-hour here, a team meeting there, a huddle, a briefing… before you know it, your entire week is consumed by meetings. And while some meetings are necessary, we’ve all seen those social media jokes about how “that meeting could have been an email.” I would bet that you’ve thought it on more than one occasion too!

When assessing process improvements or cost-cutting opportunities, we often look at downtime or stoppages and consider how we can better utilise that time, or often how much a particular blockage in process is costing the company. However, something that’s often overlooked is right there on your Outlook calendar: the sheer number of meetings you’re attending. And it’s not just you—it could be everyone in your organisation. Have you ever looked around the room or virtual table and noticed seven staff members attending a meeting and wondered, “How much is this meeting actually costing the company?”.

This is what I refer to as the “meetings money pit.”

Let’s take a typical example: a weekly team meeting with seven members that lasts an hour. In effect, you’re spending an entire workday’s worth of staff resources on that meeting. The critical question is, was it worth it? Did you achieve seven hours’ worth of output from your team? Did they arrive at a conclusion that would have otherwise taken an entire day? Only you can answer these questions.

In monetary terms, if each person on that team is on say 35k per annum, and works a 35-hour week, that’s around £20 per hour. So, your hour-long team meeting of 7 has cost the business £140. That might be money well spent but again, only you can answer that question.

When looking for ways to save money, save time, or improve productivity, the first place to start is your calendar. That doesn’t mean you should cancel every single meeting and just get on with your work—while that might sound appealing, it’s not entirely practical. However, consider these alternatives: Can you shorten your hour-long or morning-long meetings to 30 minutes or even less? Could the meeting have been an email instead? Could that email have been a Teams message? Or could that Teams message have been a quick 3-minute phone call?

The value of each meeting is down to you as the organiser and as the team or individuals participating. So, of course I’m not saying axe your team meeting as, when you have a strong agenda, they can be extremely valuable.

Some things to think about when scheduling your next meeting:

Does everyone on the invite list need to attend?

What do I want to achieve in this meeting? Is it a decision? To inform colleagues of some vital information? Whatever it is, have a goal!

Can I cut this meeting down? Would 45 minutes suffice rather than an hour?

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A Celebrant is a what…?

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A woman Celebrant standing outdoors, wearing a pink and blue scarf
Theresa – Ribeiro Ceremonies

“A Celebrant? What is a Celebrant?” This is what I hear the most when I’m asked what my job is, that or I get the ‘I’m trying not to be obvious but I have no idea what that is‘ look. Even better, and funnier: “you’re celibate?” If I could make money out of that, that would be wonderful, ha! As you can see, you’re not the only one who isn’t 100% sure what a Celebrant is or does, and that is ok.

A basic description of a Celebrant is: a person who conducts ceremonies.

If we search google for the meaning of “Celebrant” a lot of dictionaries still tell us a Celebrant is a person who conducts a religious ceremony, which shows us dictionaries haven’t yet caught up with current times, here’s hoping that changes soon!

Celebrancy or using a Celebrant for a wedding is relatively “new” to the UK. Originally founded in Australia in 1973 by the Attorney general at the time, Lionel Murphy, it was a new way of doing weddings. Lionel felt that those who are secular were also entitled to a wedding of their choice, before that they had to choose someone in the clergy or a civil authority. This meant that those who didn’t want a religious ceremony had to settle for the more perfunctory types of ceremonies done by a civil authority. It was only fair to bridge that gap and create a space for everyone to have meaningful ceremonies with substance. It also opened the doors for women & Aboriginal Australians to conduct ceremonies, both types of ceremonies were unheard of before this!

In fact it opened a lot of doors, people could choose their own Celebrant, young people could be Celebrants, inter-faith or non-religious types of ceremonies could be had and be memorable. Even better, they could be done on any day of the week at any time. Wonderful! It was all very radical and it opened the doors to many new and different experiences for a lot more people. Lionel was a trailblazer!

Eventually Celebrancy came over to the UK, and has slowly become more popular in the last 10 or so years, leading to a bit of a boom the last year and a half.

Wonderful, so there are more Celebrants & it’s becoming more popular to use them, but why is celebrancy still relatively unknown to the general population? This comes down to UK law, which states that only clergy or registrars can legally marry someone. The legal part becomes a bit of a sticking point for many, mainly because they don’t know all the options, nor how it all works.

To help us gain a little more clarity, first, let’s understand the difference between ‘marriage’ and ‘wedding’ – explained by Cambridge Dictionary:

Marriage a legally accepted relationship between two people in which they live together, or the official ceremony that results in this.

Wedding a marriage ceremony and any celebrations such as a meal or a party that follow it.

Let us also define types of Celebrants & those who already officiate weddings which will help us understand even further.

A registrar – a person with legal authority to declare /authorise a marriage but with quite strict rules in place, i.e., no religious aspects whatsoever during your ceremony. (And some other odd rules, for example, the cake cannot be in the room while the ceremony takes place.)

A minister / pastor / vicar – a member of a religious body who can apply to legally marry couples – who of course will also have their own rules, respectively.

A humanist Celebrant – humanists prescribe to a philosophy that humans don’t need religion – as such, in England and Wales they cannot do the legal aspect of a marriage. However, they can do your wedding ceremony or indeed any other ceremony. (In Scotland and N. Ireland, they do have the ability to conduct the legal aspect of a marriage – more on that in a future post)

An independent Celebrant – not connected to any religion, even though they themselves might be religious. They can include religious aspects if the couple wish to, which is great for inter-faith couples / ceremonies. Independent Celebrants cannot yet do the legal aspect of a marriage, in any part of the UK, but this brings with it a freedom to include a lot of other things a registrar or minister wouldn’t be able to include in your ceremony. (Keep a look out for the next blog post which will discuss why Celebrants can be a great choice for your wedding!)

While a Celebrant cannot do the legal part of your marriage, they can do your wedding ceremony. You’ll still want the legal part done, of course, but if you choose a Celebrant for your ceremony, you can book a 2 by 2 appointment at the registry office to make it official (on a date before or after your wedding ceremony. The ‘2 by 2’ means you as a couple & 2 witnesses) and then keep all the ceremonial bits for your wedding ceremony with a Celebrant. The ceremonial bits are things like: vows, ring exchange, the kiss, any symbolic rituals – all of which do not need to be done at your legal exchange (if you didn’t want to).

Why is it important to know all this? Well, knowledge is power, but mostly this knowledge means you know the choices available to you. Knowing your options and choices means you can properly decide what you want for your ceremony.

As a Celebrant I am slightly biased in saying a Celebrant led wedding is truly wonderful. Something new, different, not traditional & stuffy but creative and fun. However, everyone has different tastes and likes and dislikes, which is perfectly fine. Some people want to get married by a registrar or at their local Church because that’s part of their tradition and that is wonderful too.

What would be a shame is if we weren’t told all the options in order to make informed choices, We might like something different, we might want to start a new tradition? Creating awareness is a good step in that direction.

All that said, now you know what a Celebrant is and does – share it with someone you know!

Find out more https://www.ribeiroceremonies.com/

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